These last few years have changed our perspective. Her mind has gradually slipped away from us. She can no longer see or hear much at all. Her sweet little body is so small and fragile. Sometimes I try to remember my healthy, energetic grandma – the one I would try to keep up with on our long days together. That woman is almost forgotten. Impending death has a way of summoning more love than one knows is possible. Although she is 89 years old and nearly gone already, I will miss her dearly. I will miss her soft hands that so tightly clasp mine when she tells me she loves me. I will miss her cute smile when she looks at grandpa. I will miss her words of wisdom that even now are spoken, despite her confused mental state. I will miss her presence, her hugs, her laugh, and the joy that permeates out of her heart no matter how much she is in pain. Thank God I will not have to miss her example and her legacy – for each are engrained in my soul.
Grandma’s slow and steady deterioration of body and mind have not been easy on any of us. These last few years have taught me a whole new appreciation for my family. Each uncle and aunt has stepped in to assist grandpa and love on grandma. The tenderness I see in each family member as they speak with grandma and grandpa humbles me and overwhelms me with pride. My grandparents, although imperfect, raised their children in an honorable way and now as their lives are coming to an earthly end their children and children-in-law are honoring them.Observing the love between my grandma and grandpa in this stage of their life is the most moving example to me of earthly romance. Grandpa works day and night to keep grandma comfortable. When her Fibromyalgia flares up he musters up strength to act through her distress and find her relief. He serves her selflessly. Sometimes I silently wonder if he’s ever had enough or resents her demanding pain. But then God shows me moments of pure love. They still hold hands, speak to each other tenderly, and look into each other’s eyes with adoration. When grandma is in physical pain, grandpa cries. When grandpa cries, grandma reaches out for him. His tears cause me to believe that he is the strongest man in the world. He does not flee from the pain, he does not suppress it, and he does not allow it to subdue him. He loves and serves through it.
No matter how hard this season of life has been on my amazing grandpa and as relieved as he will be from the exhausting task of caring for his dying wife, I know that he will cry and miss her when she is gone. He is living out his vows to care for her in sickness and in health, til death do they part. She has been his companion, his cheerleader, and his helper. As much as I will miss my beloved grandma, grandpa will miss her more. When I see him cry, I will not be able to contain my own tears. I will cry for him. I will cry out of thankfulness to have had the blessing of observing true, selfless love in its final seasons. My heart will rejoice to have their legacy to continue. An earthly love story of tragedy, courage, hope, blessing, and romance will come to a final end. Its end will only seal its eternal beauty.
Someday we will all be together again. Grandma will be at peace soon. Eventually, grandpa will be too. We will all depart from this place and the struggles we have faced here will be history. Yes, we will miss our cherished grandma, mom, wife, and friend but we will be excited for the day that we will be reunited again in eternal bliss. If we have any recollection of life on earth when we are in His eternal Kingdom, grandma will ask us to hold hands in a big circle to sing her favorite chorus, Bind Us Together. With smiles, we will sing to our Savior forever.
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